Hello everyone!
After mice turned my attic into a 24/7 rave (complete with acorn DJ sets), I waged war using every method from TikTok hacks to CIA-level surveillance. Catastrophic fails:
- Peppermint oil: Mice used soaked cotton balls as pillows.
- Ultrasonic plugs: Converted attic into a mouse karaoke lounge.
- Glue traps: Caught 1 mouse, 3 bats, and my wedding ring.
Finally, thermal drones revealed mice using HVAC ducts as highways. Sealed gaps with stainless steel mesh + fire caulk, deployed AI-powered snap traps. But how do we reclaim attics without collapsing ceilings or violating wildlife laws?
Mice compress fiberglass insulation into nest superhighways. Use Tensylon barrier fabric ($4/sqft), chew-proof and vapor-permeable. Passes ASTM E84 fire codes. DIYers: Wear full hazmat suits!
Found 1930s newspapers in mouse nests, better preserved than my archives! Freeze-dried feces for museum display. EPA fined me $3k for ‘biohazard curation.’
Electrified gutter guards (12V) zapped mice climbing up. Fried 18 mice… and my Christmas lights. Now using solar-powered rat zappers disguised as fairy lights. HOA clueless!
Owl nesting boxes reduced mice by 60%… until owls ate my fiber internet lines. Now mice stream Netflix via chewed coax cables. Nature finds a way.
Most policies exclude vermin damage.
Mice ate my tarot cards, now they predict the apocalypse. Installed bone-chime alarms (vertebrae + fishing line). Works 90% of the time, 100% creepy.
DIY exclusion in historic homes? Violates NPS Preservation Guidelines unless using 1900s-era materials.
@EcoWarrior1 Your owls hacked my Ring camera! Switched to AI nest cams with mouse facial recognition. Now get alerts like ‘Mickey detected @2AM.’ Disney lawyers incoming…